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Being an involved grandparent doesn t come without a little work. The roots of grandparenting are formed early on. It s important to let your children know you want to be supportive to their family.
Hear are some ways to get started.
Make up your mind to be a better grandparent than you were as a parent. It s never too late to change.
Talk with your children about how they see you becoming involved with their children. Let them know what your intentions are. Be involved in the planning and do your fair share of the work.
Talk to your grandchildren about what they would like to do with you.
Involve your grandchildren in the activities you choose to do with your grandchildren. Do activities that are age appropriate and do things you like to do. Examples might be cooking, hiking, camping, crafts, dancing, singing, sports and storytelling.
Take time to do these activities one on one as much as possible. Kids need a break once in a while from their parents. Remember children behave differently when their parents aren t around.
If you can t be physically present with your grandchildren because of distance, be there in other ways. Some examples might be e-mails, letters, phone calls, gift giving, video and pictures and activity books. Any activity between families takes coordination. Don t wait for the kids to come to you.
Tell stories of your past.
Let your grandchild know how human you are. Your wisdom gained through experience has taught us to be more open to our emotions. Share your happiness, sadness, fears, embarrassments and mistakes.
Talk about your religion, talk about the lessons you ve learned in your life, talk about their parents and the fun you had raising them.
When you are together with the parents, say only good things about your time together.

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Yes, our precious little grandchildren will have faults; look where they came from, but love them with no conditions this is the greatest gift we can bestow on our grandchildren.

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About the Author

Don Schmitz is a popular speaker and writer on parenting and grandparenting. He is the author of The New Face of Grandparenting Why Parents Need Their Own Parents and founder of Grandkidsandme, which includes: Grandparent Camps and Grandkid Days. Don holds graduate degrees in Education, Administration, Human Development and father to three sons and seven grandchildren. Contact Don@grandkidsandme.com.

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Sex the Ring & the Eucharist

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Is Change Really About Behaviors in Public Schools?

 by: Leanne Hoagland-Smith

Much is written about behaviors in elementary schools, middle schools and high schools. The question is to ask is it really the behaviors that need to be changed? Are not behaviors the desired end result? Doesn t our society long for young people whom demonstrate the behaviors of respect as well as being engaged students? Would not our schools be far better off with students whose behaviors consistently contribute positively to the overall goals for the school district? If our young people could consistently behave in a way that leads to a balanced life and achieve their dreams, wouldn t that be incredible? From the answers to these questions, then behaviors are truly the desired result and hence are the end and not the beginning.

What prompted these questions were several recent conversations with clients. A school administer had contacted me about providing some consultation work around bullying. Schools across America are facing an increased in bullying and have instituted numerous programs. Some of these programs have been successful, but the bullying isn t going away even when the perceived causes change.

After several minutes of listening to the issues within this school, I made the observation that Bullying behaviors appeared to be more of symptom than the real problem facing this school. The real problem was the presence of a multitude of belief systems that existed within the school. These different belief systems remind me of the Bumper Cars carnival ride where the cars consistently bump, nudge and slam into each other. Continuing with this analogy, the bullying behavior is the outcome of these forces working against each other.

Of course in today s political correct world, we cannot use the word beliefs because someone immediately thinks of religion and how church and state must be kept separate. Yet, beliefs simply are those foundational, internal thought processes that determine what we do as individuals. A variety of attitudes or what some call habits of thought support these beliefs systems.

For example, in education there are many resources devoted to helping at risk children. These resources have been in place for over 40 years and have developed a belief system that at risk children need these resources and without these resources they will not be successful. However, the outcomes of improved academic performance continue to elude many of our schools. The recently released Nation s Report Card showed no progress during the last 33 years in reading scores for 17 years old and these students average scores were not even close to mastery of the reading skills required in today s knowledge driven workplace.

One of the newer belief systems in education centers focuses on the behaviors of young children. Never in our history have we had so many children on medication to treat active children or what some call hyperactive children. One would think that this phenomenon is an anomaly given that 40 to 50 years ago this problem was fairly insignificant. Now if a child acts up, a belief system reinforces the need for medication and special education. Can you imagine what classrooms and schools will look like in another 40 years?

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Until belief systems are first acknowledged and then identified, sustainable change will continue to allude our educational institutions.. But what is even more important, the persistent application of traditional solutions will drain our critical resources and continue to harm our young people and set them up for a life of failure instead of success.

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Copyright 2005(c) Leanne Hoagland-Smith, www.processspecialist.com

This article may be freely published. Permission to publish this article, electronically or in print, as long as the bylines are included, with a live link, and the article is not changed in any way (grammatical corrections accepted).

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Muslims are not our Enemies

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